"Depression's Eleven Big Lies EXPOSED!"

29 January 2020: "The seventh lie is that you're worthless. You're not. I promise you that. And you don't have to prove it because it's self-evident and comes as a package deal with personhood itself." --John Moe, on The Hilarious World of Depression

I mean, come on! Tattoo that sentiment on the eyeballs of every person who ever feels worthless. So good and necessary.

I continue to be so impressed by the important work The Hilarious World of Depression does. The episode I listened to this morning--"Depression's Eleven Big Lies EXPOSED!"--provides a terrific example. A compilation of listener input, it lists the lies depression tells people who are going through it.

More posts on this amazing gift of a podcast here.

"The Hilarious World of Depression"

18 December 2016: Just took a long (and cold!) walk through my neighborhood while listening to a what seems to be a great new podcast (which I heard about from "Pop Culture Happy Hour"): "The Hilarious World of Depression." The first episode features "Wait, Wait"'s Peter Sagal. Definitely worth a listen!

Yeah..that's it...

6 November 2017: "The thing they don't tell you growing up about life is this: life--it's every single day."  --comedian Gary Gulman explaining why it can be so hard to get out of bed sometimes, on this episode of The Hilarious World of Depression. 

I listened to this episode this morning while getting ready and heard this particular segment as I walked through one of my favorite parts of campus, my filled with thoughts about how much there is I would like to fix in the world, both locally and globally. I've been sort of struggling to articulate just what Gulman says here (and listen to the clip--it is also funny when/how he says it) so I was moved and relieved to hear him say it so well. Life is just...a lot sometimes, isn't it?

Sunlight

8 July 2021: “There’s so much frustration and being like, ‘Nothing you’re doing is making sense. Just take my hand and come over here to this side and then you will live.’ And the inability to do that rationally, deeply suggests that there is a disease component of this thing, right?” –Stephanie Wittels on this episode of Depresh Mode, talking about her brother, Harris, who died from an overdose. 

I am so glad to that John Moe found a new home at Maximum Fun after The Hilarious World of Depression was canceled, because his shows just continually make the world a better place. Hearing him talk with Stephanie about their experiences (John also lost a brother to addiction) rang so true to me, over and over again. 

The anger you feel towards the two people you are dealing with: your brother and the person he has become who is somehow still your brother but has permanently made your brother go away, years before he actually dies. I can remember yelling at him, “Can’t you just keep it together for a day?” (a wedding, a party, a holiday). 

The expert who told John his brother's brain had "holes in it" from the drugs and he would never recover fully, just like a friend who told me, "Oh yeah, that stuff changes the brain. It's permanent" and I felt the little bit of hope remaining inside me fade.

The way you wonder what difference you could have made. I was kicking around all kinds of intervention ideas right before he died, but who knows? 

And the very insight Stephanie talks about above—those moments where you realize how little control an addict can have. And you get it and you know it but you are still so frustrated and angry and you miss your still-alive brother so much, but not nearly as much as you will when he is gone. 

It’s so complicated and sad, but sunlight—talking about it all in public—can only help. 

Keep talking about it...

22 June 2017: “I told him [my son], ‘Your uncle had a brain disease…and it killed him,” because I wanted to protect my five-year-old, but I also wanted to tell the truth…And I thought, ‘People need to talk about this,’ and I’ve been trying to talk about it in any venue I could find since.” –John Moe, in this episode of The Hilarious World of Depression, a discussion with Ana Marie Cox.

I've already blogged about this podcast before, but until this episode, I didn't realize that the host also lost a brother to addiction, mental illness, and suicide. It is (almost) always strangely comforting when hear someone else say these things, especially about the need to keep talking about it.

Bonus "listening" thing: the first segment of this episode of Nancy (though the second segment is fun and also worth listening to). In it, a classroom of third graders reach out to Gavin Grimm, sending him their love and support. It had me tearing up as I took my walk today, filled with hope for our future if these kids are even a bit representative of their generation.

Two things...

14 August 2019: Still working through this funk I've been in, which seems more intense when I've got lots of unstructured time on my hands. ("Unstructured," of course, isn't the same as "nothing to do." I've got lots to get done...)

Anyway, as I know I've written about so often before, walking always helps. On my walk today, two things made me feel better. First, The Hilarious World of Depression, particularly this episode about travel. I actually intentionally waited until after my research trip to listen to it because I was a bit worried it would hit too close to home. But it's really interesting and moving, as all the episodes are.

Second, a conversation with a neighbor. As I walked down one cul-de-sac, I waved to a woman doing yard work. (I wave so much on these walks--to passing cars, to people in their yards, to cats sunning themselves...) On my pass back up the street, the woman cut across the road to talk to me. "Are you Dr. Hanrahan?" she asked. Turns out she remembered me from my Lectures and Libations talk. She also remembered that I had won the award right before and congratulated me again. I complimented her yard and asked her about a plant that stands out to me every time I walk by. (Turns out it's a type of milkweed. Huh!)

When you are having a rough time, having something like that happen? It means so much. And yet another reminder of how blessed I am to live in this place and have this job.

Podcast MVPs...

23 March 2020: Wanted to shout-out a few of my favorite podcasts that are turning out content to keep me calm and even entertained these anxious days.

• 99% Invisible, specifically, "Roman Mars Describes Things As They Are," in which Roman literally walks around his house and talks to us about the design in what he sees. When he said, "And since many of us are stuck at home, maybe alone or lonely, I thought we’d spend some time exploring this place we call home together — just you and me," well, I felt my eyes well up. And then he delighted me for the next 20 minutes.
• Pop Culture Happy Hour, specifically "Favorites, Even Without A Festival: The Music Of SXSW," in which Linda, Stephen, and Glen share some of their favorites from the Austin 100 list. These three always lift my spirits, but I especially appreciate them sharing upbeat tunes. (Really digging this one!)
• The Hilarious World of Depression, particularly this episode where John Moe gives great advice about how to get through this. I got weepy here, too. 

Another podcast...

17 January 2017: "Actors who are in a play and have depression but can function don't want the third act to come around. They don't want to leave there. They are in a setting they know...And they know everything's that going to happen there." --Dick Cavett, on "The Hilarious World of Depression" podcast. Here Cavett is telling a specific story about Judy Garland, who was reluctant to leave his studio after he interviewed her just before her death. It's just so sad. But the entire interview--in which he talks about his own depression, too--is riveting. And not just sad. It's funny and, in places, uplifting, too. Give it a listen.

"John Ross Bowie and Jamie Denbo Don’t Need Your Suggestions For Their Life Improv"

12 July 2019: Catching up on The Hilarious World of Depression podcast today, listening to an episode from way back in December. Not sure why I let this one get backed up. Maybe the fact that it went on break in January and new episodes stopped piling up gave me an excuse. Maybe I was just saving them for when I needed them.

Anyway, this episode, featuring John Ross Bowie and Jamie Denbo, is really great. They are a married couple, both in comedy, and both struggle with depression. To hear them talk about their experiences and hear how much they love each other...well, it was powerful and sweet.

By the way, this might be the podcast I've blogged about the most, which is a bit surprising. Check it out: previous posts here. here, here, here, here, here, here, and here. I can't say enough about how much good John Moe is doing for the world through this podcast.

Spring Break and the storm is approaching...

13 March 2017: "Sometimes when I'm on my own I get like very...ummm...I don't know if it's like depressive or like existential...I go from zero to existential very quickly." --Aparna Nancherla on this episode of The Hilarious World of Depression.

This one hit close to home today, the first full day of Spring Break with this big stupid snow storm approaching. Not looking forward to being snow-bound.

Incidentally, I've blogged about this podcast before. It really is so good and I can't believe I'd fallen behind on listening to it. I also listened to the Jen Kirkman episode today and it is great.

"The Holiday Coping Mechanism Spectacular"

23 December 2017: "Sometimes I just make a list of people that I know would want me to get through the holidays. I don't even have to know them...but I know that Oprah would want me to get through the holidays." --Jen Kirkman, on this wonderfully helpful (and funny) episode of The Hilarious World of Depression.

What a gift this podcast has been this year, right down to me listening to it today on my drive up to NY. The realization was enough to make me make a donation to it right before writing this post.

"For Moses, After He Learned to Say the Letter S"

26 July 2017:
"You learned to pronounce the 's' in 'sky.'
The ky has gone out.
Never again will stars twinkle there like diamonds.
No longer will we gaze upon the ky in the dwindling night before bedtime.
It's all right.
Our time in the ky was short and miraculous.
Who knows what new wonders the full sky holds?" --John Darnielle, reading a poem he wrote for his son and shared on The Hilarious World of Depression. 

(And because I heard the poem and didn't see it, I am guessing, almost certainly incorrectly, about the line breaks.)

Listen to the whole poem, which starts at about the 7:45 mark of the episode. Lovely and moving.

And yes, I've already blogged about this podcast twice before.

Real vs. feeling real...

21 October 2017:  “Is there a difference in the end in something being real and something feeling real? Not for me when I am inside it.” --John Green on The Hilarious World of Depression.

I know I post about this podcast a lot, but it so consistently features smart and moving insights on artists/creators and their struggles. I just love it.