First place!

21 October 2026: After a long, non-stop day at work, I barely had time to feed the cats, change the litter boxes, and pull the trash can down to the curb before heading out to the casino for Wednesday night trivia. But I had been looking forward to it all day. 

Had a blast today even before we came in first. That's the first time it's happened since I've been playing with these folks. The win is just the cherry on top, though. 

Sometimes brave, sometimes not...

20 October 2026: An HVAC tech came by this morning to do the yearly inspection. Jo stood at the door when he arrived, went right up to him, and was generally pretty nosy for the first half of his visit here. Something must have changed, though--maybe too many loud noises?--because after I had been working at the table for awhile, I realized I had some company hiding on the chair next to me.

I love this about her; sometimes she's so audacious and sometimes she just a scaredy cat. And when she's the latter, I love that she finds comfort near me.

Dinner with Lee

19 October 2026: Way back in July, Valerie, Sadie, and I planned on taking Lee, our SUWP admin, out for a meal to thank her once her position ended (when the grant ended). Then...life intervened. 

Tonight, we finally made it happen. Felt really good to thank Lee and just catch up with her. 

(Sadie's daughter was sick so she had to miss...)

The Midlife Plot Twist...

18 October 2026: Listened to this episode of Depresh Mode on my walk this morning and once again found myself thinking how often John Moe's work makes me think and moves me.

"Frederick Douglass and the Freedom of Writing"

17 October 2026: Our SUWP/Common Reading "Pop-Up" event was a real success today. Still barely keeping my head above water, but it's really something to see kids happily write their own stories.

 

Founders Day

16 October 2026: Didn't take any pictures, but Shepherd celebrated Founders Day today for the first time in a few years. I was so busy today, but am glad I took the time to join the festivities. Find that joy when you can!

Gonna fly now!

15 October 2026: What's the nerd equivalent of running up the Rocky stairs?

Seriously, though: Slate's "Pears" game is a daily delight for me. 

"Run"

14 October 2026: Last weekend, I listened to Vampire Weekend's Contra from start to finish for the first time in years. Man, did these songs come right back to me. I've been humming tracks all week since then.

Busy Tuesday...

13 October 2026: Two meetings, one doctor appointment, one presentation/pitch, and fourteen essays graded. Not bad for one day. Even more encouraging is that part of me found the rush exciting and even energizing. 

The sunshine and warm temperatures certainly helped, even as the leaves covered the sidewalks on walk this morning. 

Doing all the appointments and meetings on (and around) campus before 2:00 and then getting home to grade and do other work from 2:00-6:00 also helped--a lot. 

I was sort of dreading this week, but so far, I am handling it and can see a light at the end of the tunnel. Sort of...

"Maybe we lived between hurting and healing..."

12 October 2026: On my walk this morning, I was thinking about sadness, anger, and guilt, emotions that I wrestle with these days in the aftermath of the last ten months. This morning, I found myself wondering about the relationship between the three. Does one drive the others? Does one feed the others? Do the roles switch? I feel like figuring that hierarchy out is important--but not to get past them. Just to understand and keep going. 

When I got back to my office, I looked over my notes for the Young Adult Lit class. We were finishing up Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe, which included a discussion of the line that gives this post its title. 

Seeing that line in my notes seemed important. Trying to figure out if that's where I am...I think so? And that's a good space for thinking and thinking and thinking...

World Series...

11 October 2026: Got up really early to drive back from Pennsylvania in time to play with my Wednesday trivia friends on the "World Series." We came in 11th out of 50 teams (and were only 2 points away from 10th place). I had a blast, too. 

Favorite person/favorite place...

10 October 2026: Longwood Gardens might not be my favorite place, but it's high on my list, mostly because I am always there with Vogel. 

I thought springtime with the tulips was the best, but holy cow, the fall flowers are beautiful, too.

Cucina Massi

9 October 2026: Joined Tim, Michael, and Nina tonight in Frederick for dinner at the restaurant where Denis works. He's leaving both the restaurant and Shepherd next week we had never visited him there. It was a really lovely, fun, and bittersweet time. 

Almost 52...

8 October 2026: The days before October 9 are always bittersweet. Tomorrow would have been Ryan's 52 birthday. 

I wonder what he'd be like today if he were still here. 

I wonder what these last years would have been like if he had been with us. 

Mostly, I just miss him and find myself wondering, wondering, wondering...

Late afternoon sun...

7 October 2026: With fall kinda-sorta-maybe starting to settle in, it was nice to get home before 4:30 today, open the windows, and spend some time with the girls before heading back out for trivia at the casino.

 The days are getting shorter and the mornings colder. Sunlight and open windows are on their way out...things that aren't great for my mood. Feels good to seize the chances I still have.