30 December 2020: How in the world would I have made it this far through this garbage year without my cats? It's almost unimaginable. They are there to help me remember to pause, to take a breath, to feel warmth and love. And yeah, sometimes they remind me of all of this even when I am trying to get work done, like earlier today.
Today has been a day with some highs and lows. Got a lot done up at the office. Took a good walk around town. But I also keep thinking about how bad things are. So many COVID cases. So many people who travel and mix like it's not happening. And this new strain? Lord, help us. Found myself thinking today, "What if normal just isn't coming back?" (I know that's irrational, but just the idea of normal seems so far away.)
All of this was on my mind when I was trying to do some work-related reading earlier. Even if I wasn't actively thinking about it, the mood was there. Sadness, loneliness, anger, fear all mixed up.
An old Sam Cooke song came on the Pandora station--one that has always calmed me. Combine that with Bing's gentle demands that I see him and well, I stopped, breathed, and settled down a bit. And yeah: sitting here with my old boy, so loving and insistent in what I know are getting to be the tail end of our days together, that's where it's at.
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