Sunday, October 12, 2025

Good Boy

12 October 2025: Was not expecting an indie horror movie to send me into tears that haven't entirely stopped hours after I saw it. 

To be clear, Good Boy is a heck of a movie (and only 73 minutes!). But the plot (spoilers) involving a beloved dog watching his owner, a haunted and sick man, take his own life, with his sister finding the body...well, when I saw that was where it going, the tears just started. 

I felt it in my whole body. Even as I write this six hours later, I am crying a bit. 

Ryan would have turned 51 this past Thursday. 

He's been gone for over a decade. 

Most days, as I've written about, the good memories ride side-by-side with the bad. 

It's been a long time since the grief has hit me like this. So raw and just so sad. My mind is going to the saddest places--thinking about that last day and the aftermath. 

It's humbling. You think you are past it, but no.

I felt bad about being so upset and bumming out poor Amy. When I dropped her off, I said I was sorry again. Then I realized she's such a decent person and that she was more concerned than someone who need an apology. So I said, "It's okay. It's a good thing to grieve." 


Have had a bit of a headache and jaw ache from the emotion of it all day, but at one point, I laid down on my bed and listened to "Better Together," to think about Ryan and Sugie. And me and Jo and BabyCat. I cried some more. 

It's a good thing to grieve and remember that it comes from love. And that love goes on. 

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