Why hasn't anyone thought of this before?

21 January 2017: "We need a different word for reading on the internet...We really shouldn't call it reading. Slurping? Eye-slurping? I don't know." --the hilarious Justin McElroy on the latest episode of Sawbones. This is an idea whose time has come. (He was talking specifically about a nut-job who did a lot of "reading" on the internet before developing a silver cure-all. And, as Sawbones has taught us, "cure-alls cure nothing.")